This song goes out to all the hard working men and women who have always considered their office or plant or school someplace they HAD to go but suddenly find that it’s now a place they’d really LIKE to go.  If this describes you, then maybe you should send this song out to your place of employment.  With apologies to Randy Travis… 

Suppose I called you up tonight
And told you that I missed you
And suppose I said I want to leave my home
And suppose I cried and said I think I finally learned my lesson
And I’m tired of spending all my time alone

If I told you that I realized I’d like to see real people
And not the ones on my Zoom screen all day
Would you tell me that you need me there
And that my job’s essential
Or would you simply laugh at me and say

I told you no, I told you no
I told you there’s no work and it don’t matter
If you want to come back in
I told you no, so don’t ask to go
Because there’s nothing here to do
And you will never leave your room at home again

If I got down on my knees
And had them swab my nose and test me
If I sheltered fourteen days without a cough
Would we get that old time feeling
Would I work my full-time hours
And would you say I don’t need more time off?

Would you tell me that you missed me too
And you still find me desirous
And you’ve waited for the day that I returned
And I can hang out in the breakroom
That’s been steam-cleaned for the virus
Or would you say the conference table’s turned?

And would you say
I told you no, I told you no
I told you there’s no work and it don’t matter
If you want to come back in
I told you no, so don’t ask to go
Because there’s nothing here to do
And you will never leave your room at home again

Because there’s nothing here to do
And you will never leave your room at home again

[BTW – my wife thinks not enough people know this song for this to be funny. I beg to differ. How can people not know one of the best songs ever released by the greatest country singer of our time??]